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A few weeks ago I was having dinner with a friend, when she told me a story about a guy she used to date accusing her of holding a grudge. It got me thinking, when was the last time I heard that word (outside of that scary movie)?

And then I got to really thinking about grudges. What is a grudge, really? According to Merriam-Webster : “a feeling of deep-seated resentment or ill will.”  And, it so occurs to me that people grossly abuse the definition of this word.

For example, in my friend’s case, this guy had betrayed her trust, twice. She was done. Adios, see ya later. Months had passed and he attempted to reach out, saying he was sorry (apologizing months later? lame) and expressing a desire toward friendship. She basically told him she wasn’t interested in being his friend, and along came the accusation of holding a grudge.


Here’s the deal, folks, we’re grown ups. We have busy lives, work, family, homes, kids, goals etc. Dishes need to be done, walls need to be painted, project need to be completed. Who has time to cultivate a friendship with someone who has already proven (in this case twice) that they are kind of an untrustworthy jerk? It’s not a grudge, dude. There’s no deep-seated resentment, there’s no ill-will. There is nothing wrong with choosing not to be friends with someone that sucks.

Surround yourself with positive, encouraging, FUN, supportive people. Do right by you, first and always. There’s nothing wrong with that, and never let anyone convince you otherwise!